2 Love, Honor, Cherish…. -Understand your bride – D.M. Escalante – escalanteministries.com
Let’s pretend that you and I have made this appointment to talk about marriage. I trust that we could be sitting down for a cup of coffee or whatever. I know a chill place at town-center we can go to.
If I could add value to your marriage I would say the following verse right here, has helped me answer the “why” in my personal relationship with God. Read the rest of this entry
One Jet at a time, One gripe at a time…
As a young aircraft mechanic tasked with setting our priorities for the day. Each newly promoted supervisor took a day to lead. It was not usual for each shop to dictate what maintenance they were about to do us included. We left those decisions in the hands the squadrons our more experienced maintenance controllers. Today was different I was at the helm for the power plants shop and had the distinct honor of representing the work center and relaying what our status was for all 18 aircraft we were working on, simultaneously. Eighteen different projects each with checklists and procedures that must be strictly followed. I could not begin to convey to you all the consumable parts like washers and o-rings we had to order in a single day. On top of that we also took charge of managing the technicians who were working these discrepancies, it was a lot to keep track of. We had to get seven aircraft ready for the next days flight schedule. The challenge was, we only had about ten hours to do it. With every aircraft torn apart for one problem or another left by the off-going shift, it seemed like a daunting task. We had a mission to do! we work to give student pilots solid aircraft to complete their training and head out to the fleet. It was a little pressure in retrospect to say the least.
“One Jet at a time, One gripe at a time,” said my maintenance controller. That’s how you do it! It seemed simple enough. Fix one problem at a time on each plane at a time. I take this lesson I have learned and share with you: When it seems like you have more problems than solutions? Fix them one at a time. Do not get anxious and try to work all the issues you are facing. Just work them out one at a time. You can get creative and work the easy ones first or group similar tasks together for better management.
when working on your marriage or that “Honey-do” list. This method has helped me immeasurably. Before during my first years of marriage. My family took a backseat to my career. Granted when I started out it was just me and Teresa. It was a rough few years. When we recommited to our marriage to make it work and then later with the arrival of our Son. I knew I needed to use a different system to make family work. So that equally my family is strengthened as well as my career or job. I don’t know where you may be at in your role as a man. It could be you are young attacking the grind of getting after what you want. You could be in a position where your in the middle of your work years and you get the notice that your services are no longer necessary and your marriage is not where it was or where it could be. You may be at the top of your mountain looking back at your struggle, wanting to tell those climbing what are the important things you must take with you when you reach the summit. I encourage you that God is not finished with you.
Philippians 1:6King James Version (KJV)
6 Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ:
King James Version (KJV)
You are in a position that is orchestrated for you to choose to move forward. Either on what you think you should do or to lean not on your own understanding and seek wisdom.
When you feel overwhelmed, it is okay to acknowledge that you are. Take a few breaths regain your control and remember where your strength comes from.
2 The Lord is my rock, and my fortress, and my deliverer; my God, my strength, in whom I will trust; my buckler, and the horn of my salvation, and my high tower.
Psalm 18:2 King James Version (KJV)
Identify what needs to be fixed now, the no kidding critical issues that if left untouched would have grave consequences. We can look at our situations and feel the fear cripple us from taking action. I recommend against that to enter your heart. Many fail not for a lack of trying but for a lack of taking the first step.
Then identify each issue and draft a plan to fix it. What are action steps to take to get it fixed? Is it beyond you? That’s okay too. But to not fix it because the issue is beyond your level of expertise is unwise and you hurt yourself at the end. The problem will not leave until you give it a new address. Taking one gripe at a time, one jet at a time slowly turned around things in my life’s priorities. Your not alone in this world. There are groups of people just like you and myself who do their best to make connections in family, profession, and their faith work. We go to church, pray and become inspired from the word of God.
If you don’t have a connection with God. I invite you to get to know him. He loves you and wants you to know him as if your life depends on it.
First, admit that you need his help. I’ll tell you I struggled many, many years trying to go at this world alone. You need source that is unending, never failing. He always has your back.
Next, believe that God’s one and only Son Jesus died on the cross to remove the irreparable sin in your life.
Then, Commit to God’s way of doing things. Now this is not easy at first!! this takes getting to know who God really is. Not what you hear from t.v. Preachers or magazines or even documentaries. This takes reading God inspired word, the Bible. But where do you start, right? If you ask me? I would say, start reading in the book of John. Write down what sticks out to you or what you may not understand yet. A chapter a day is a great start. Then when you feel up to it add a chapter of the book of Proverbs as well. Best advice I have ever read.
Spend time talking to God using prayer. Just a few moments a day is a great start. You can share how you are feeling or ask questions you may feel silly, trust me he is listening and he will answer you be patient and look for it. Many misunderstand this communication and miss out the best part of God.
Get to know God’s people by going to a bible based church. I know what does one look like right? You could ask around or look on the web. Well, for right now look for one that has a friendly attitude you can tell a genuine love for people. Then during the service listen to what the speakers are saying, write down the scriptures that may be displayed and look them up in your bible. If you know someone who is a Christian, they are great resource to help you get connected it will be okay to ask them.
New friend, I want you to know that as I am writing this I am praying that you will make a decision to live for Christ. Don’t wait until it is too late. There is a fate that is worse than death. But that will be another time….
Our Marriage is over…..
2015 I believe is the year of reclamation. so how do I as a God fearing man redeem love in my marriage? Good question. The Answer? in short, the Holy Spirit. Now here is the essay answer:
My marriage was great! In fact, it was glorious. But it has run its course and NOW IS OVER…….
Before I get the “stink-face”, stay with me.
I wrote the header above in part because I have heard this often in my career even in myself. I heard this not as a Minister but working as a Mechanic with co-workers underneath the jet with our arms up in an aircraft engine in the heat of the day with sweat jumping off our faces. Divorce affects everyone and right now you’re seeing your marriage as over and with that thought it will be. Although it does not have to be!!!
When you were married promises were made; you to your spouse and vice versa. God made a promise to both of you. not that you will win the lotto or be famous. He promised that no one will tear you both apart from each other. That being said you have a “Silent Partner” within your marriage called the Holy Spirit. let me assure you that trying to fix your marriage by yourself within your own strength is about as effective trying to stop a train on a dime even at moderate speed.
Here it is Superman. Your marriage has ended in the way you have seen it. Try loving your spouse in the way Christ loves the church. if you need outside help, get it!!! True, Jesus does not get pestered to take the trash out or even why he left the seat up. but he does get told what HIS kid did that day. All joking aside. Praying and asking the Holy Spirit to help you and guide you to a better marriage is thee only way to begin your marriage afresh.. thank you for reading and I pray that your marriage will prosper even as your soul prospers.